My pelvic area is a disaster: abnormal bleeding, ridiculous amounts of pain, and every day, as a girl, you are reminded that this issue is simply part of the road to becoming a woman.
I was blessed to welcome my unbelievably beautiful daughter and son into my life as a young woman. Giving birth to my son nearly cost us our lives. My beautiful baby was lying in the wrong position, got stuck in the birth canal and came into the world with great force. During the first years of his life, he cried a great deal and very intensely.
The birth of my miracle child brought considerable devastation with it. My bottom was completely torn apart: torn, cut and stitched. I could no longer defecate because of the tear in my anus, and urine ran down my legs. I screamed in pain while having a bowel movement. Shaking, sweating and hyperventilating, my stool finally came out. I stopped eating and lost 20 kilos. I was 28 years old, incontinent and exhausted.
The rape in my early teens had a tremendous impact on my mental health. I experienced many periods of depression. Fighting this pain became my greatest challenge. Something breaks inside you sexually; the playfulness disappears. I had countless conversations with psychologists, and to this day I can suddenly be overwhelmed by reading a newspaper article or watching a film. Sexual violence is very close to home every day. Sometimes it feels paralyzing that my children have to grow up in the same world I grew up in.
On top of all this, I was diagnosed with LS at a young age. I also had to live with an adenomyotic uterus for twenty years. This is a form of endometriosis. Hallelujah: my uterus was surgically removed toward the end of my thirties. Thanks to the best specialists, I have my LS beautifully under control. I have embraced this condition with love.
My mother was 57 when she suddenly passed away during a holiday abroad. We were there with my two children. It turned out she had a very aggressive brain tumor and had to undergo surgery in the country we were visiting. In the end, she returned to the Netherlands in a coffin.
I was so angry at the whole world. I thought: fuck it, if I only make it to 57 too, now is the time to turn my life around. I quit my job, received part of my father's inheritance and started Pavone.
I don't think I need to explain to anyone why I started developing my own underwear. My vulva issues and my mother's death led me to design and sell the softest and most woman-friendly bamboo underwear in the world to women everywhere.
And all these women have stories. Stories about pain, loneliness, illness and finding their way back to themselves. My Pavone is underwear that brings stories together, acknowledges conditions, and sees and hears women in what they need. Women with lichen planus, vulvodynia, incontinence, eczema, lichen sclerosus, vulvar cancer, ulcerative colitis, pemphigus vulgaris, dermatographism, as well as women without these problems but with sensitive skin.
I see you.
I listen to you.
I hear you.
I feel you.
And I will continue to do everything I can to design underwear that makes you feel supported in this oh-so-intense world.
