My pelvic area is a disaster: abnormal bleeding, an absurd amount of pain, and every day, as a girl, you are reminded that this issue is simply part of the journey to becoming a woman.
I was blessed to welcome my unimaginably beautiful daughter and son into my life as a young woman. My son's birth almost cost us our lives. My beautiful baby was turned around, got stuck in the birth canal, and entered the world with great force. During the first years of his life, he cried a great deal and very intensely.
The birth of my miracle child brought considerable devastation with it. My intimate area was torn to pieces: ripped, cut and stitched. I could no longer defecate because of the tear in my anus, and urine ran down my legs. I screamed in pain while having a bowel movement. Trembling, drenched in sweat and hyperventilating, my stool finally came out. I stopped eating and lost 20 kilos. I was 28 years old, incontinent and exhausted.
The rape in my early teens had an enormous impact on my mental health. I experienced severe depression many times. Fighting this pain became my greatest challenge. I had countless conversations with psychologists, and to this day I can suddenly become overwhelmed by reading a newspaper article or watching a film. Sexual violence is very close to home every day. Sometimes it feels paralyzing that my children have to grow up in the same world I grew up in.
On top of all this, I was diagnosed with LS and had to live with a uterus affected by adenomyosis, a form of endometriosis. Fortunately, my uterus was surgically removed toward the end of my thirties. Thanks to the best specialists, my LS is beautifully under control. I have lovingly embraced this vulvar skin condition.
My mother was 57 when she suddenly passed away during a holiday abroad. I was there with my two children. She turned out to have a very aggressive brain tumor and had to undergo surgery in the country we were visiting. After lying in a coma for 4 weeks, she eventually flew back to the Netherlands in a coffin.
I was so angry at the world and thought: fuck it, if I even make it to 57, now is the time to turn my life around. I quit my job, received part of my father's inheritance and started Pavone Lingerie.
I don't think I need to explain why I started developing my own underwear. My vulvar troubles and my mother's death have led me to design and sell the world's most women-friendly bamboo underwear to women all over the world.
And all these women have stories. Stories about pain, loneliness, illness and finding their way back to themselves. My Pavone is underwear that brings stories together, acknowledges conditions, and sees and hears women in what they need. Women with lichen planus, vulvodynia, incontinence, eczema, lichen sclerosus, vulvar cancer, ulcerative colitis, pemphigus vulgaris, dermatographism, and also women without these problems but with sensitive skin.
I see you.
I listen to you.
I hear you.
I feel you.
And I will continue doing everything I can to design underwear that makes you feel supported in this oh-so-intense world.
